The Casual Sex Project’s Discovery
What one NYU professor is discovering about casual sex
What comes to mind when you hear the phrase “casual sex?” Is it your sordid college past (or present), strangers passing in the night or a steamy one-off encounter on a business trip? These scenarios, and more, are at the heart of The Casual Sex Project, a website launched by NYU professor Zhana Vrangalova that seeks to demystify casual sexual encounters.
On the site, anonymous posters can share their true stories of past sexual experiences or hookups of all kinds: one-night stands, friends-with-benefits, short flings, booty calls or sex with an ex. As long as you’re not or haven’t been in a serious relationship with the person you’re writing about, the Macedonian-born doctor wants to hear about it all, or what the site refers to as “the good, the bad, and the ugly.”
The point of this project to Vrangalova is to find out more about the casual experiences of the non-college set (though they’re included here too). The college years, to most, is a time to misbehave. But why and how are twenty, thirty and forty-somethings still seeking casual affairs?
“There is so much talk about the hookup culture these days, about hooking up completely replacing dating on college campuses and young people in general, about casual sex invading the sexual space and disrupting time honored traditions and norms. But most [people] rarely get to hear about specific casual sex experiences other than those of their closest friends, and thus have a very limited idea of what that may entail. So I thought it would be useful for people to have a place to share their stories of hookups, in a sort of structured and organized way, and to read about other people’s experiences in this way,” the NYU professor told the Huffington Post of her project.
She adds that she hopes the project will help educate people about the reality of the “hookup culture” and seeks to prove that not all casual sex happens to be bad, especially if it’s a mutual agreement.
When I checked out the site, the posters were certainly varied. There was a 29-year-old Indian male from New York, a 19-year-old California girl and, surprisingly, a 53-year-old Greek woman who shared she opted not to turn a steamy encounter into more despite her partner’s willingness.
Hookup culture is a big thing. In California, where I currently live, Tinder is a way of life. I’ve met people on the social media app which connects you with your friends’ Facebook friends (so they’re mostly legit, or at least can be vetted) who have used chance encounters to get over their ex, get their rocks off or – shockingly (and only shockingly because it worked) to meet the love of their life.
The point Vrangalova is trying to make is strong. Casual sex isn’t just something that spurred by cheap beer and frat parties — for some, it’s empowerment. And really, who are we to judge? It’s whatever makes you happy, right?
