The True Love Tester Bra: Pass!
If you’ve ever had the “should I or shouldn’t I sleep with him?” quagmire, there’s a new over the shoulder boulder holder on the market with your name on it. May we present, with great fanfare, the True Love Tester Bra.
Now, as you know, love and sex are easily confused, and because of this, Japanese lingerie company Ravijour plays brilliantly into the muddled mess of our hearts and nether regions with some true marketing genius. Its high-tech bra is being tapped as not only a way to “save women” from unwanted sexual advances, but also as a way of discerning when we’re well and truly turned on. Hence the problem I have with the name: True Love or Truly Horny? But I digress.
With some patented and innovative technology (which sounds to this cynicist like a slightly more upscale version of a mood ring for your bosom), the clasp of said bra will automatically unlock when it senses that a gal is ready to do the deed, like a modern-day tech-savvy chastity belt.
It contains a hidden sensor which is cleverly synced via Bluetooth to an app on the wearer’s phone that analyzes heart rate. When your heart rate speeds up to a certain level, the clasp pops open and you’re free to do the deed. *Note to self: do not wear the True Love Bra when working out.
On another level, I’m worried about a woman’s ability to think for herself. Just because your heart rate speeds up, just because you’re turned on, that doesn’t mean you should sleep with someone — it just means that you want to. And as we all know, there’s a world of difference between the things that we want and the things that we need (hello: welcome to my shoe closet).
So ladies, as cool and kitschy as this sounds, remember that you can’t rely on external objects — or people — to tell you what you do. Look within and figure it out for yourself. You may make the wrong decision occasionally, but at least you’ll know your decision wasn’t based on a potential tech malfunction.
If placing the blame on your bra for something you regret is easier than chastising yourself, then hey, who am I to judge? Do what makes you happy!
